DVS socially distances itself from Houten with 7-1
A pandemic is running free. From Turkey to Belarus to China, state control with suppressing leadership is everywhere. The economy risks running a standstill. These are gloomy times indeed. But there was always a bright spark for the soul. A ray of sun behind the clouds. Some juicy binging behind your TV: Keeping up with the Kardashians. But now these divas have announced the end of there reality series. So this report will be a homage to their artistic 20-season masterpiece. And as a sequel to there series, I introduce: Keeping up with DVS 2 (1 season). You can follow us on any social media, feel free to copy our haircuts or buy the same cosmetics as we always do.
All camera’s were aimed at the home team last Saturday. Although there was some nervousness for the first shoot, we never doubted ourselves. What was most disturbing was to find out that instead of one dressing room each, we were denied access to a shared one. We obviously sued the municipality for such brutal treatment and utter lack of respect for our status.
Over to the episode itself. JayJay and PriPri started off with men’s doubles. It was clear PriPri has been working out for the start of the season and he was looking ravishing. JayJay was just in time covering up the dark lines under his eyes with the latest DVS foundation (in stores now). They struck killing poses and once the stage was set, the opponent never got out of there grip. MaiMai and LayLay had good opponents. But it is common knowledge that good always loses to awesome and this wasn’t an exception. 2-0.
Than the selfie-sessions could start. RamRam was playing a young and coming star and struggled a little bit at the start. But once it was clear for him that to win, serves have got to land within the eyeliner on the ground, he sliced and diced his way brilliantly to victory. Whichever way the swung his selfie-stick, his opponent didn’t have a clue where the shuttle was going to go. GiGi is the youngest on our show, with possibly the greatest potential. Countless followers on Insta. But in such a competitive surroundings its difficult to be a star instantly. She helped keep the match Covid-19 compliant, because 8-0 would be an a-social distancing. And our amicable opponents did not deserve a total rout. As I understand it, she has her targets already set for the coming weekend. #treffersgehaktvanmaken.
LayLay had the longest game of the match. A gruelling three-setter where she recovered from trailing 16-12 in the third, she showed her class and stamina. With a big smile and new extra lashes, she walked stylishly of the court and gave out signatures for the gathering crowd. JayJay was surprised to see his opponent outside before the game combining a red bull with a sigaret, which can be seen as a sign of overconfidence, an acquired taste for the better things in life or sheer desperation. In any case, it didn’t help him, the not too interesting game ended in our favour.
Which leaves the mixes, also known as couples posing. Although most of our stars prefer to shine at the selfies (singles…), this could turn out to be our greatest strength. PriPri and MaiMai have been a celeb couple for some time now, and the confidently disposed of their opponents. No sweat ruining their make-up. RamRam and GiGi are a new combination but it surely looks to be a strong mix for this season. Great job!
It’s time I finish my report now. The oysters are prepared and the yacht is sailing out. In about 16,5 minutes the sun will set and the light will be less than complementing on my skin-tone. I encourage everybody to like this report and add me to your Insta, because it’s still pretty depressing to be 1 billion followers down to Kim and Kylie. But do follow us, because keeping up with DVS 2 is going to be challenging this year!